2019 Goals Recap

Another of my favorite photos from this past year.

Hmmm, where to begin :)

When I first thought about doing this post I thought that clearly I didn’t accomplish my 2019 goals, however, in actuality I accomplished more of them than I thought. I figured I’d outline some of the goals for 2019 that we accomplished, didn’t accomplish, and the things we accomplished without ever writing a goal.

Things that Were On My List

No Excuses:
Oh my gosh has this been a HUGE improvement this year. I have always had low resiliency (although I didn’t necessarily know what to call it) and would give up at any excuse to do so. Not on the really big things but the small things for sure. This year I’ve really dug in, in multiple ways and proceeded without making excuses. I may still whine about it but more and more I’m just getting up and still doing the thing. I’m SUPER proud of myself and even if this were the only goal I accomplished this year I’d feel good.

Too funny not to share. I was in the middle of filming our riding routine for my 

Insta story and Katai decided to pee complete with grunting.

Track my Rides:
This was a success although not maybe specifically in the way I thought it would be. My goal throughout most of this year was to use Equilab more often and preferably through every ride. I do still sort of want to use it but I have some issues with it including that I don’t have a good way to carry my phone and, while I’d love to keep ride notes in there as well, I’ve really been trying to get away from my phone especially at the barn. It also wears the battery down pretty quick since my phone is old and if I had to choose between that and listening to music, I’d rather listen to music.

Instead, what’s worked really well for me is the planner I’ve been keeping. It’s called a Clever Fox planner and I like the formatting a lot. It’s the first planner I’ve actually had that works for my brain. I’ve managed to keep up on it and track throughout most of the year, however, it’s been more about planning out a schedule ahead of time, tracking when I’m actually at the barn, and taking some minimal notes about what the ride/training was like. I’m looking at other options for taking more detailed notes this next year including a more specific riding journal or figuring out using the Equilab.

The amazing deal of the century were these two Pikeur show shirts for $5 each

Spend Less/Budget Better/Pay Down Debt:
This was also a huge success this year! Not only have I not been using a credit card at all for any purchases but between myself and my boyfriend we’ve managed to put together a down payment for a house in about 5 months while also paying down credit card debt. This is HUGE for me and I’m so happy that, thanks to my boyfriend, I’ve found a system for budgeting that works for me. I’m also planning out the next few years budget for paying down the rest of my high interest debt and actually being able to afford, not “afford”, a truck and trailer.

Get a New Job:
Big success. I not only found a job, it’s a job I’m really enjoying with a great boss and a much more equitable income for my skill level and experience.

Cuddling Connor <3

Dressage Lessons/Clinics:
I’d mark this as sort of a success. I took advantage, as much as I could, of taking lessons from K while she was still at my previous barn and then did two clinic rides with her trainer. Those were fantastic rides and I learned a lot. However, now despite having access to a trainer I think my goals have shifted slightly and I’m hoping to be able to trailer out to one of 2-3 trainers for lessons each month or two during the summer when the weather is such that the roads are safe.

I’m not sure what that means for next year since I’m fairly certain that I won’t own my own truck and trailer.

Vary the Work:
I’d say this is also sort of a success. I found a trail ride buddy at the old barn and we had a couple of great mini trail rides between both of us struggling with mental health stuff and a very hot and humid summer. I also did a bunch of work in hand, ground poles, and learned some new groundwork exercises. Also, just in terms of keeping the work fresh, Katai hasn’t been working so there’s that…

Show:
Nope! I’ll leave it at that.

Get Back in Shape:
No :( This was a very achievable goal but it didn’t happen. I’m still out of shape, weaker than I want to be and way less fit plus I have weight to lose. I am working on it now and I’m feeling really committed to making this happen.

Blog More:
I mean technically I’ve blogged more this year than last year but only by a bit so I’m not going to count that as a true success since my goal was to get back to posting at least 10-15 times per month.

Another Insta Stories Video

Things That Weren’t on My List

Relaxation:
I had a couple of realizations with this over 2019. The first was working with K’s trainer in April when she told me that “until you get the relaxation you can’t get anything else” which was basically to say that Katai is fantastic and very talented but in order to progress we needed to work on relaxation first and foremost. I’ve never had an instructor bring that up before but I agree wholeheartedly. I spent most of the rides following that working on relaxation and was making a ton of headway so I’m looking forward to getting back to that.

In addition, regarding relaxation on the ground I had the realization when waiting for the vet in November that my anxiety has been the main cause of ground work related issues. Katai is SUPER well trained and light to lead, she stays out of your personal space, and responds to just intention even if you need her to back up or pivot around. I’ve never handled another horse that’s as responsive and polite as she is to handle.

However, if her adrenaline is up her brain shuts off and there is almost zero ability to influence her unless you are absolutely being way overbearing. At that point she starts invading personal space, running into you with her head and neck, rearing up while tied or even in hand, and making stupid decisions like trying to bolt. I’ve approached that as a training gap but it is absolutely an anxiety related issue instead which is helpful from an awareness perspective and also good motivation for me to do some work to improve my ability to manage my anxiety.

The mare bear herd :)

Grooming:
I got a new clipper I really like so my body clip looks much more professional. I’ve also been getting her cleaned up more often if she has manure or urine on her back legs even if it takes a mini sponge bath to do so. It’s her least favorite thing but having the heated barn with a hose and warm water makes this possible again.

Heat:
Yes, moving to the barn was 100% the right thing both for my mental health (great people!!!) but also for my physical health (it’s warm!!!). It makes it take way less motivation to go out to the barn and I can be out there when it’s really cold, just not necessarily if it’s snowy so at least I’m missing fewer days which was the goal.

There are many things I won't miss from our apartment
but I will miss this view from our rooftop

Settling In:
Something I haven't written about much is how much things have changed for me in the past year in regards to really settling in vs. always having my foot out the door on everything. I've always wanted to live in a different state, for example, which led to me always having that in the back of my mind with every decision I made. It meant that I never really committed to friendships, jobs, or relationships. I also didn't feel like I could make big decisions because I wasn't sure how things would change in the future. Meeting my boyfriend and having him know what he wants (where he wants to live which is local and that he is a city boy) really made me re-look at my motivation around moving etc.

Doing that, meant that I realized that I don't actually care that much about living somewhere else and that I'm truly ok with boarding for the rest of my life instead of owning my own farm. These things meant that instead of whining about things like the weather and dreaming of living somewhere else I'm just able to buckle down and find creative solutions to those complaints. I've also been committing to friendships, settling into the work I'm doing at my job (and envisioning a career there), and really trying to find my place in the local community (both horse related and social).

It has felt so good and like the No Excuses goal, even if this were the only thing that came from this year it would feel like a huge success.