All The Changes - Mindset

This is less a post about mindset and more of a post just listing some of the really positive things going on in my life right now since so many of my recent posts have been pretty overwhelmingly negative.

The BF

Not too surprisingly he's one of the shining beacons in my life right now. Being with him is everything I hoped a relationship would be (both the amazing and the tough) and more. He's supportive while also pushing me to be the best version of myself and he appreciates when I do the same for him as well.

Stopped at a light today I took this picture
of the place where we had our third date <3

New Barn

Not necessarily excited about the move but I am so, so, so excited to be closer which will help improve my motivation, and therefore how often I make it out there, and therefore how positive I feel about life :)

The Puppy

I've always loved and always will love Veggie but there's just something different about Moshy who's my little puppy soulmate. She is everything that I've ever wanted in a pet. She's just chill about everything and very calm, dainty, and sweet in a way that none of my other pets have been. I am all about rescuing animals and all of my other animals have always been rescues and I will absolutely rescue again but picking out the exact puppy, and breed I wanted means that she is just perfect for me.

Cleaning her tiny paws

 Media

I've still been watching through the Robert Dover clinics for tidbits to work on but in addition I discovered Oliva Tower's Dressage Youtube Channel. She's humble, funny, down to earth, and shares both the good and bad. She struggles/struggled with mindset so it's really enjoyable and motivating to watch her work to improve. I highly recommend all of her videos but the two below are some of my favorites.

Work Right Now

Work certainly wasn't one of the things on this list for a long time but thanks to an amazing manager who honestly asked for my feedback which gave my the ability to share how I was feeling some changes have been made which resulted in a promotion for me as well as a change in workflow. That has removed one of the most repetitive parts of my job and freed up time for me and my coworkers to actually get all of our work done and work on improving projects vs. just constantly struggling to keep our heads above water.

She also really heard me on not wanting to travel as much with some of the stuff I have going on in my life right now which means I haven't traveled since early this year which has been a nice break. I enjoy the travel and am looking forward to getting out to WA again but it's been really nice having a quieter year this year.

All The Changes - New Barn

We are finally getting nice summer weather!

This is going to be one of a series of catch up posts that I’ve written already and will post over the next week or so. Previously I’d been working on multiple updates but by the time I got back to working on the drafts they were always out of date. This way that won’t happen!

Where to start. I think where I automatically want to start is by explaining why I’m moving again since I’m embarrassed by the number of barns I’ve been at. However, every move has been for a good reason and I haven’t burned any bridges or had issues at any of the barns, I’ve just had really good, really different reasons for leaving each time and most of those were because of non-horse life changes that caused a ripple effect.

As mentioned in my last post the main reasons for this move were cost and location. These wouldn’t have been factors if it hadn’t been for all of the other things I have going on in my life right now and, while some of them I maybe could have planned for better, for the most part it took me being at my current barn to decide that it wasn’t going to work out.

The puppies playing/cuddling for T.
I'll have to do a whole post on them at some point :)

Cost and location are pretty clear reasons for a move, however, in addition there is also the fact that while moving to a barn that trailered to shows sounded ideal in practice it’s not necessarily working out for where Katai and I are right now. For one thing they only trailer to a very limited (3-4) number of rated shows per year. No schooling shows, and all of these are out of town, and require a full weekend and a hotel. That is not only costly but tough to make my current schedule align. Plus, right now I really need at least a few schooling shows to help Katai build confidence in being off property at that type of environment. I know, I know, beggars can’t be choosers but based on the shows they selected this year I haven’t been able to attend even one show and I’m concerned about my ability to next year as well. Since that was one of the primary reasons I moved here it was one of the things that caused me to re-evaluate.

When I did decide to re-evaluate I went back to the options I had listed prior to moving to this barn which were:

-Moving to an expensive show type barn that trailers to shows where I don’t need a trailer

-Moving to a cheaper, more bare bones barn that met my basic requirements where I could save some money and hopefully afford a trailer, and therefore more flexibility, in the future.

I tried the first and the only other options for barns like this would cost approx. $1000-$2600 per month (or even $3200 if I wanted them to groom and tack up Katai for me [which I very much do not just so we’re clear]) which is money I certainly don’t have. Plus, in those cases I’d likely be facing very similar problems to what I am right now except that they would be closer to my current location. 

The fairy princess looking like a princess

The second was tough mainly because the barns that I was looking at were very bare bones and were either just pasture board with no supplements fed which would be really tough, really far away which would be tough, or were so bare bones that they didn’t even have an indoor which basically would mean not riding for 4-5 months out of the year in MN.

I sat on this for a long time and had started contacting barns for tours since I knew that would help me make the decision. However, in the meantime I sent a completely unrelated message to a local dressage rider on Instagram commenting on a story she had posted about the gorgeous new rose gold OneK that I’ve been coveting. She actually responded and then I randomly asked her where she boarded since I didn’t recognize the location from the pictures. It turns out that she is the dressage trainer at a unadvertised local barn that met pretty much all of the requirements. Even better she sent me the contact info for the barn manager and when I wrote to the BM I found out that while they almost never have openings they happened to have a couple and were interviewing people that week. I managed to fit in an appointment and for the first time ever interviewed to get into a barn. 

and not looking quite as much like a fairy princess

It felt pretty intense especially since she gave me an idea of the “competition” I was up against but luckily it was determined that Katai and I would fit in well and so we got a spot for move in around mid-August.

This barn is much more in line with Jane’s on a sliding scale of small bare bones barns to fancy huge show barns which is perfect because Jane’s is still my favorite place I’ve boarded at. I may have even gone back to Jane’s except, something I never mentioned is that, it was for sale and sold shortly after I moved out. However, one big improvement is that this barn has two outdoor arenas and trails right on the property. Right down the road there are also additional trails and it’s pretty close to another dressage barn that also has a dressage instructor (because options are nice). There is a dressage instructor/trainer on site as well who I’m hoping to work with (the person I messaged) and I think that she and I will get along just based on following her Instagram for awhile J

Proof that sometimes we have a string of good days :)

There are other dressage people that board there who go to a decent number of local, rated shows and I know that the trainer is willing to haul so fingers crossed this will work out to be the best of both worlds. The indoor is quite small and not heated and the barn is also not heated which is going to be the worst part of the move but with how much closer it is and the other amenities I think it will balance out.

Overall I’d say I’m optimistic about the new barn. I’m not excited about it only because I’m dreading another move and the upheaval it causes and I’m wanting some stability in my life since I’m really over the gypsy lifestyle at this point. However, I’m already feeling motivated to work with Katai when I have a 25 minute drive vs. a 50 minute drive to the barn. I’m also excited about being able to work with another dressage instructor since I learn so much from each person I work with.

A Fun Sunday

Not that I don't always have a fun time on the weekend but today was sort of a nice, horse filled, day of doing just the things I wanted to do since my bf was doing the thing he loves (cars) all day.

Picture from my last ride, today I rode outside!

First off, I got Moshy mainly so that I could have a dog that could go do things with me. I adore Veggie but he just wasn't socialized well enough so while I can do the things I need to do with him it certainly isn't fun or always safe to bring him places and the barn tops the list of places he shouldn't go. With Moshy I not only chose a breed that I knew could be a fairly decent barn dog but I've also worked with her a ton to socialize her to all the things she'll see at a barn. The toughest has been horses since I got her during a really long cold winter and she was just too tiny to spend much time at the barn.

While she's really well socialized I've been a bit nervous to bring her back to the barn since if she wasn't good with the horses it would be tough to manage her there without just bringing her back home and with the drive out 50+ minutes it wouldn't be nice to have to just turn around and bring her home.

Then yesterday I got an invite from H to go watch her ride at a really nice local show that was close to my house. Right away I thought of bringing Moshy with me but I knew it wasn't the best idea to test how well she'd do around horses there for the first time in a few months so I decided to start at my barn. I knew it would be quiet since most Sunday mornings there are a lot of people at church or sleeping in and I went for it.

Long story short, it went really well! I walked her a bit around the parking area and then carried her over towards the fence of a pasture with two quiet horses in it. I didn't get too close and she barked a couple times but they weren't spooked and when I gently scolded her she gave it up and just watched, interested to see what they would do. I eventually worked my way up to the fence and she was still calm and quiet. After that she never barked again! I walked her all over, introduced her to the old mostly blind barn dog, held her near the cross ties while a friend was grooming their horse and carried her while I walked Katai back to the pasture after my ride.

During my ride she hung out in her carrier in my car with all the windows open (it was in the low 70s and overcast so she stayed nice and cool) and I'm pretty sure she just slept. If I do this often I may get a plastic crate to keep in the back of my car just so that she has a nice secure place to stay while I ride if needed. If it's warm, I could put her in the air conditioned lounge instead. She was just so, so good and it felt so validating after all the work I've done.

My ride was pretty decent as well. Katai had her mare panties in a bundle and didn't want to pony appropriately but she let me help her loosen up and then we got some decent work and some of the best shallow serpentines at the canter that we've done where she really sat back and carried vs. just running. More on how we got there in a different post though!

After Katai was put away I stuck around and let Moshy run around a bit more and talked to friends. I didn't want to go home for an hour or two and then leave for the show but I also didn't want to get there too early. Eventually we left for the 1+ hour drive to the show grounds. I stopped for lunch, gas, and coffee along the way and Moshy mostly napped or watched me drive.

Once we got to the show grounds I crossed my fingers that she would remember and not bark and she came through! I carried her at first and we found the barn with H in it. She thought Moshy was adorable, as did many other people who stopped me to meet her, and gave her some pets while she was getting ready. We got there about an hour early so we had a chance to chat and for Moshy to meet a few dogs which she was a total lady about.

Eventually H was ready and we headed out to the arena to watch. Moshy made more friends and then sat quietly on my lap in the bleachers watching H put down a really good test that she ended up winning a blue for. After that we chatted a bit more and then I headed home with a nice sleepy puppy who immediately got a bath since her mop self had picked up most of the nasty things on the barn floor at that point.

I had so much fun and it was so nice to have a well behaved companion that I didn't need to worry about come with me and do all the things. I'm planning to make bringing her to the barn a regular thing!

So sleepy

Shifts

It has been so long since I've posted, almost a month at this point, so I'm pretty much giving up on my posting goals for this year.  I'm also tired of doing update posts but I also want to share all of the cool things we've been up to recently!

From this past week. I'm a sweaty mess but she's always gorgeous

First off, no I'm not at a show right now unfortunately. We made the call about two weeks ago that while Katai is making huge improvements in her ground work stuff she still isn't at a point where I can get her attention back on me, at least in show appropriate ways, so we want to get that more solidified first. In that vein, a couple of weeks ago when I had the lesson where we made that decision (on a Saturday) I decided to also sign up for as much training as possible and took lessons on Monday and Tuesday that week (which I had off work) and then another lesson this past Saturday.

S2 has been really complimentary of the training I've done with Katai. She was surprised and impressed that Katai had most of the buttons she needed to do the work that S2 has us doing on the ground and really just needed refinement. I also haven't known when to push, what to push for, and when to take all of the pressure off for some of the minor behaviors that Katai has had so we're working on that. Namely Katai always pushing me around with her shoulders. It's slow because it's a pretty well established habit but we are making headway and it's amazing how helping her to soften and bend her ribcage and move her shoulders around on the ground is helping under saddle.

Katai really loves the new arena except for the side door.
That ear needs to aim in that direction to ensure we stay alive

Then again it should be too surprising because S2 has had HUGE success doing this with her horses and client horses and has her silver medal.

From a dressage perspective I do miss Jane. Her instruction was just so fantastic and her way of teaching really resonated with me. I still don't really think that I'll have a chance to regularly lesson with anyone that amazing again. However, S2 is not only a really solid dressage instructor, she also has the show experience that Jane lacked. She's able to identify in each movement exactly what the judges will want to see and what could lose me points and that is something that's really helpful at this point now that I have a baseline to build on thanks to Jane.

Good side eye
Mare glare was clearly tired of the mirror selfies

I also had the opportunity to go on a trail ride! I was waiting until I could go out with someone way more experience who knew the way and had a solid trail horse and I got that opportunity finally last week. The trail, within riding distance of the property, was very technical with lots of gain and loss of elevation and we did it all at the walk so it was perfect for her busy brain. At first she was just rushing and not listening. She was also tight over her back and trying to trample the (very, very, experienced and patient) trail horse ahead of us. At one point though we headed down a hill that was covered in pine needles and therefore slightly slippery and she realized that maybe listening to me and my half halts was a good idea. After that she was zoned in and while she still wanted to go she was also really listening. It was also an amazing workout for her and she was nicely sweaty and tired by the time we got back. This sort of slow, hill conditioning, outdoor ride is exactly what I was hoping for since trying to build or maintain fitness at our last barn was nearly impossible.

I'm really hoping to find an opportunity to ride along one of the next times that this person trailers out to a trail ride so that Katai can get more off property experience doing something that she enjoys.

Pre-spay happy puppy :)

In other dressage news I also found out that I won't be able to go to the June show. Unfortunately it happens to fall on the weekend that I'll be in NC with my BF at a wedding. Honestly, if I hadn't already bought plane tickets I may have abandoned him haha but with the tickets I was already at the point of no return. It really sucks that a big part of why I moved was to show and now that's not happening but I am looking forward to the opportunity in the future and by the time it happens I should be that much more well prepared.

I also may be able to ride in a dressage clinic at the end of the week next week so fingers crossed for that!

My rides have been cut down to 4 days per week and this past week I only managed three since I ended up coming down with a really bad cold. I have today off and I'm hoping to ride all four days of this four day weekend but Moshy was spayed on Thursday so part of the plan is to make sure I'm mostly around to keep an eye on her and make sure she's not chewing on her stitches at all. She's doing pretty well but is clearly uncomfortable and I feel bad for her.

What I've Been Doing

While I can't ride.

Can't ride might sound a little dramatic but it's where I'm at right now. I spent some time trying to find someone who could adjust a Prestige saddle tree in the area but wasn't able to locate anyone so I ended up mailing my saddle back to VTO which means that I won't get it back for awhile still. I have my back up saddle but it still doesn't fit, Katai still isn't happy, and because it keeps shifting around on her back it's causing me anxiety attacks. Literally, like I had to dismount and was in tears and almost threw up last time I rode. Jane even noticed how shaken I was and we've canceled lessons until my saddle gets back.

I'm dealing with my SAD which is manifesting a slightly different way this year with more anxiety. I've got the support I need but brains are funny sometimes and mine doesn't want to play along right now. The crazy winter storm that we got on Monday (12.5") didn't really help.

Yes, that snow pile is higher than the door of my car.
Thanks MN...

I'm planning lots of spa days for the pony, which are sorely needed, and I've already "pulled" her mane. I've also done some other things to prepare for having my saddle back, hopefully having decent weather, and feeling better including;

Media!
I don't know if you guys remember this little guy from last year but I didn't have him for long since he died a very crushing death by being stepped on by a horse. Pun totally intended.

Happy to have my little super hero back

I had gone back and forth about replacing it and decided to get a go pro but they're so expensive that I hadn't done it yet. In the end I got an Amazon gift card that basically covered the cost for the GenII Cube. These supposedly are better in low light so I picked up another one of these. I can't wait to use it to get more ride and lunging footage!

Homework:
Like a lot of other bloggers I've been watching the USEF Network videos of the Robert Dover clinic. It's amazing how good dressage is good dressage and how despite these riders being far and away more talented and further along than me and riding really fancy horses compared to Katai, I'm learning so much that I can apply to my rides with Katai.

Spa Days:
Katai desperately needs her back legs washed, I'd really like to wash her mane, and I want to braid the top and bottom of her mane to hopefully get it back to where it stays on one side of her neck. I also want to pick through and trim her tail and potentially trim her feather a bit to prepare for the mud that's to come.

Good puppies nicely play with their toys together.
Tough to tell from this picture but he's 9 pounds and she's 2 pounds.
He plays so gently with her!

Cleaning!
I haven't done it yet but I plan to pick up Windex this weekend and clean the arena mirrors! That way I'll be able to take way more mirror selfies ;)

Getting My Memberships:
So far I signed up for USEF and my group membership with the USDF through my GMO. I still need to get Katai registered with the USEF but I decided to wait until I get her coggins and can confirm that the vet clinic gets it right before I register her with the USEF under her show name vs. her barn name. I'm also tempted to register her with the NDPC so that I can potentially show at some NDPC qualifying shows. We have a couple in my area but they aren't shows that I can get to if I don't get a trailer so I may wait to make sure I get that accomplished this year before I register her

She did this herself while I was working from
home during the snow storm on Monday.

Lunging:
I'm not a huge fan of lunging but Katai needs to get some work since her turnout is slippery and she's otherwise in her stall. I'm hoping to do some free lunging and some more structured lunging.

Ground Work:
Katai is tricky since the ground work things that crop up otherwise don't tend to show themselves in her home environment. However, she has gotten a little bargy recently so I want to work with that. I can also work with the mounting block bareback and try to get her to stand nicely again. Currently we're at baby OTTB level for the mounting block and she's off to the races the moment my foot is in the stirrup.

Also making "healthy" banana bread

Bareback Rides: 
To be completely transparent I'm not sure if I'm up to this right now but I do want to try. At least walking her around bareback would be good for both of us if I can keep it together so we're going to take some baby steps and try it.

Puppy Time!
Not completely horse related but I do want Moshy to be good at the barn. With our extremely cold weather there was no way that I could take her but this next week is forecast to be much warmer. Plus I don't need her to hang out by herself while I ride so I plan to bring her to the barn most days. Tomorrow I even have a volunteer to hold her while I do spa things with Katai.