Niall's Injury Update

I’ve struggled with how to start this update so I think I’ll just start from where I left off in my previous post. Buckle up because this is long. 

 Niall arrived on October 23rd late in the evening. She settled in immediately that night drinking, eating, and calmly looking around. Just to make sure everything was smooth I was out at the barn the following morning for her first turnout in a solo paddock and again she was foot perfect. We allowed her a couple of weeks to settle in, figure out the routine, and meet the small herd that she would be integrated into over the fence before doing any introductions. 

Then on, or around, 1/8 we turned her out with one member of the new herd to allow her to slowly acclimate vs. just throwing her into the deep end. On that first day there were no fireworks, both mares were quiet, didn’t kick, didn’t squeal and seemed entirely disinterested in each other. The second day was the same and then the third day (Wednesday) the barn owner texted me that she had caught both mares butt to butt kicking at each other and when she broke them up Niall walked off slightly ouchy. She kept an eye on things that day but nothing seemed overly concerning so when I got a concerned text from her that evening with a video of Niall trotting out lame my heart sank. 

Luckily I already had a vet appointment scheduled for that Friday (they were going to look at her teeth so she'd be ready for a bit) and the BO told me I should ask the vet to bring x-ray equipment. Ugh. When I was able to make it out the following day Niall was uncomfortable at the walk and her hock was swollen but she was weight bearing. The BO had kept her in her stall that day and we left her in the stall until the vet got there on Friday morning. He hadn’t initially seemed overly concerned but as I walked her out of her stall to go trot her up for him he said there was no need, she was clearly off so he said we should go straight to x-rays. My heart sank again. 

We did a full series of X-rays on that hock and from that we didn’t see anything. Me and the BO were feeling hopeful that it was something more minor but as the vet was packing up to leave he told us both that he was seriously concerned. He was thinking there could be a fracture and that because the injury had just occurred, they weren’t seeing anything on the x-ray. He gave me a treatment plan of stall rest with 10 minutes per day of hand walking and 1 gram of bute per day. If things didn’t substantially improve he wanted to do another series of x-rays about 2 weeks later. 

I hand walked, buted, and monitored her with a significant amount of help from my amazing BO who has much more experience with this type of thing than I do. I’ve never even had a horse on stall rest because Katai was freakishly good at avoiding any sort of injury for the 9 years I owned her so this was all new to me. Unfortunately by the end of the first week it was clear that we were going to need to get additional imaging. The swelling would get better after we sweat wrapped it but immediately return and she was not improving enough in soundness at the walk. 

Of course two weeks out from the initial injury was also the week of Thanksgiving so we ended up doing additional x-rays at 3 weeks. During those x-rays the vet still couldn’t find anything conclusive but his recommendation was to bring her to the University of Minnesota vet clinic for a standing CT since that would give us more information. Alternative options were offered based on how much I wanted to invest in a horse that doesn’t have really any intrinsic value and who was brand new to me. I discussed it with James and we agreed that having an answer would be worth the cost so I started working to get the CT scheduled. 

Not surprisingly it is extremely tough to schedule a last minute procedure with a lameness expert that is in high demand during the holidays. After several false starts I was able to get a last minute appointment on the Monday after Christmas purely because the vet was extremely kind and willing to fit us into his schedule. This worked because we were just looking for the CT and not a full lameness workup. Because of that though we needed to be at the clinic by 7 which, with some quick math, meant that I needed to get up by 4am to be at the barn with enough time to load up and ride with her to the U. I also needed to coordinate this with my BO who was hauling. Thank goodness for kind people. 

Technically this was from before stall rest but
I'm seeing a lot of this right now when I walk into the barn.

We had everything ready to go and then the forecast for Monday started looking bleak. After consulting with the BO late on Sunday evening we decided it wasn’t the right choice to try to drive with a snow storm on the way and ice in the forecast. It ended up being the right call because everything was glare ice on Monday. Luckily, with a bit of a scramble I was able to get an appointment rescheduled for that Wednesday, two days later. 

Of course, Tuesday evening saw more snow and another weather warning but with no ice, a brave (and extremely kind) BO who is an experienced Midwest driver/hauler and an amazingly kind finance who was willing to get up with me at 4 and drive me to the barn in the morning so that I didn’t need to drive in the snow we were ready to go. 

We showed up at the barn on Wednesday morning around 5am and the temps were in the minus double digits. Because of the cold impacting equipment, we ended up needing to haul with a back-up trailer (thanks to another amazingly kind boarder at this barn) that had open slats on one side so we layered Niall up like a marshmallow. I’m not sure if she had ever worn a neck on a blanket before but she put up with me bundling her and then proceed to walk calmly to the trailer over slippery snow, hopped right in after just a brief hesitation, and was absolutely perfect other than not wanting to step forward enough for us to get the slant closed. All of that despite the fact that she was going on 7 weeks of strict stall rest at that point. We eventually got the slant closed, closed up the trailer and were on our way. 

I’m extremely glad that we had someone that was experienced with winter hauling pulling the trailer that morning but we made it safe and sound with our little convoy of me in the truck with the BO, Niall in the trailer, and James following us in his car so that we could go straight home from the U. We got checked in and then unloaded Niall. She was a superstar climbing slowly and carefully out of the trailer and then walking calmly into a large, state of the art vet hospital. We pulled her blankets off and then stood her on a scale and she stood still calmly while we got her weight. Other than a bit of concern that one of the door sills was a horse trap she was calm and easy to lead to her stall and she started eating her hay as soon as we pulled her halter off. On the way out I got to talk to the lameness vet that was going to be overseeing the CT and he let me know that we might not have results for a day or so based on timing. 

The BO headed home in the truck and James and I made the shorter drive home to wait for the call to come pick her up. They were able to get her in pretty quickly because of a cancelation so we met back up at the U at around 2 to pick her up. Again, she was easy to handle and loaded right back up with still just a bit of stickiness with walking far enough forward that we could close the slant. Not a big deal though, we got it closed eventually with some gentle encouragement and made the easier drive back to the barn where again she unloaded like a princes and seemed happy to see her stall. Then it was just a wait to find out the results. 

Unbeknownst to me what I thought was an email with a receipt was actually the report with the findings from the CT but I didn’t notice that until the next morning when my vet called me to talk through the results. It was then that we learned that my vet was correct all along and we have been dealing with a fracture, specifically of the talus bone. There is also potential damage to the collateral ligament but we will need an ultrasound and potentially arthroscopic surgery to look more closely at that. At that point my vet wanted to do some additional consult with the lameness expert vet and in the interim just wanted me to continue stall rest and hand walking. Back to the waiting game. 

Proof that Niall appreciated her sticky ball treat

Again because of the holidays we didn’t find out more until the following Tuesday (1/4) when my vet called me again. He had been at my barn and I knew that my BO was going to ask him what was going on. Because he had been at my barn that morning he had actually been able to see Niall walk and based on that and the consultation with the lameness expert on the results the conversation was actually incredibly hopeful. The current prognosis is that if she heals ok she could potentially still be a riding horse which was honestly better news than I was expecting to hear at this point. 

Based on the location of the fracture it does not make sense/is impossible to fixate it with hardware so we need her to be quiet enough for long enough to heal it on her own. Based on that we’re looking at 4-6 months of stall rest from the initial date of injury which means stall rest until early March to early May. We are currently up to 30 minutes of hand walking twice per day and while I’m not able to get her out for 30 minutes twice every day, thanks again to an amazing BO, she’s getting out twice when possible and I’ve been out at least daily to do the evening hand walk during the week and twice daily to hand walk when I can on the weekend. 

Throughout all of this I’ve been amazed and touched to realize how many incredible people I have in my life. Everyone in my community has pulled through for me in such big ways while also dealing with their own things. It’s been incredibly humbling. 

In addition, Niall is exactly the horse I was looking for when I started down this path. Her brain is so good, she’s so intelligent, calm, and willing and that has also helped me get through this. Everything from her standing perfectly for x-rays to the whole adventure of trailering her to the U all with a horse that was wild only about 6 months ago and without any sort of pharmaceutical support. With that my overwhelming feeling at the start of this year is hope. Hope that Niall will heal well and that we’ll be able to have adventures together and hope that overall things will be a bit smoother for me this year.

Starting 2022 out with a Bang

It has been a long time since I’ve blogged formally. While I have tried to keep up with updates on Instagram sometimes it’s tough to share the amount of detail that I would have previously on this blog. Without belaboring this, and to move quickly to the topic that I know everyone is interested in, I was working through a great deal of internal conflict about whether to blog again. While I enjoy writing, it seems like this community has substantially reduced in size and I’ve enjoyed the more active dialog on Instagram. However, as mentioned there are some details that require a longer format and so I’ve decided to blog on a more reduced basis and only when I feel like it rather than trying to achieve a greater number of blog posts like I did previously. With that out of the way let’s move on to the more interesting updates. 

The last time I posted a blog was in March of 2021. I had ended 2020 on a high with Katai’s training as we were working on third level, high quality (at least to me) trot work. I had never imagined that I could get to that point with the lama like pony with the sewing machine trot that Katai embodied when I first brought her home. We had a ways to go with the canter work but even that wasn’t looking too shabby. However, while we had made such significant gains in our home arena I had my doubts about my ability to be comfortable showing Katai.

 

 In the horse/owner relationships there are obviously two beings each with their own needs. While I have always wanted to show and have adventures, any sort of change stressed Katai out in a big way. Trailering was something that caused her be soaked in sweat and she would climb off the trailer shaking. I have no doubt that there are people out there that could work with her to a point where she would be more comfortable with those things but it was becoming apparent to me, after 8 years of ownership at that point, that the person who could do that was probably not me. Still, I wanted to give it one more good try. 

 Here we need to go back a bit. 2018 and 2019 were tough years for me and Katai. It felt like there wasn’t progress and I didn’t have the time to work with her as other things in my personal life were pulling my attention. There was also a lot of strain between the two of us with me trying to come to terms with what I wanted in an equine partner vs. what Katai wanted to give. During the end of 2019 I significantly changed how I approached training with her and started to see a bit more progress. Based on that I set myself a goal, or mission, to spend one full year working with Katai in that way and if at the end of it I still couldn’t see enough progress in our partnership I would find her a new home. 

Of course, 2020 ended up being the year of a pandemic but in some ways that meant I had more dedicated time at the barn which helped a lot. Overall 2020 was actually an awesome year for us. I started working with Megan from A Enter Spooking and had several remote lessons. I tackled getting Katai out of just the indoor ring and saw a ton of success with riding outdoors, and with Megan's help we made tons of progress in dressage. As mentioned, we ended the year on a high and I had decided to keep going with the work and not rehome her. 

Then 2021 hit and everything horse related for me went to hell in a handbasket starting with an extreme cold snap, off and on unsoundness for Katai (vets have believed it to be muscle related), then the decision to move based on not getting any ride time with how busy the arenas were. From January on nothing went the way I’d hope and it felt like 2 steps forward and 5 big steps back for the whole year. After a few barn moves I ended up at an amazing barn where I still am today. The community was supportive, I had the opportunity to trailer with a group to shows, and I had access to a lovely outdoor arena and trails. While I was pumped and loved the barn community Katai did not handle the transition well. Despite everyone being lovely and treating her like a princess and not having any real change to amount of turnout or diet she was spooky, herd bound, and anxious. She was also starting to act up a bit when riding in the arena. Nothing big, but it just didn’t feel like her heart was in it. Vets had been consulted earlier in the year, she was getting monthly massage, her feet were looking better than they ever had, her diet was the same and I couldn’t find anything physical. 

In September I was watching a video on youtube that randomly helped clarify everything in my head that I’d been fighting for so long and right then and there I made the decision to rehome Katai. I’m someone that acts immediately once my mind is made up so that weekend I reached out to a contact who I know and trust that I thought might be interested. Within the next few days it was official, Katai was going to go to a new home. 

It’s absolutely the perfect situation for her. She’s been stepped back in workload and her new person is much more zen and doesn’t have any intent to show. She is hoping to trailer Katai off property to trail rides at some point but I was very blunt with her that it may not ever be something that Katai is comfortable with and she’s fine with that and taking it slow. 

 To some, it may look like this was easy or casual and that may lead people to think that I didn’t love or care for Katai and that couldn’t be further from the truth. She and I had an amazing 9 years together (I rode with her to her new home just one week prior to our 9 year anniversary) and I love her dearly. While we didn’t always see eye to eye and we definitely antagonized each other sometimes, we had a long and complex relationship. She was with me through so many changes in my life and she was always my primary focus through all of that. It still hurts to not be riding her and I miss our routines and how I knew her like the back of my hand. What I can say is that I’m happy, content and haven’t looked back because I made this decision not just for me but for her and she is thriving in her new environment. 

That makes my heart happy. 

That decision, putting her first and finding her a different home, meant that I was in a tough place horse-wise. I had not expected to be at the point of looking for a new horse so didn’t have anything saved for a horse purchase. Of course I have emergency money but didn’t want to spend that money on something that, while it may have felt that way to me at the time, wasn’t an emergency. While I hadn't taken any budgetary action, because I had longer term concerns about me and Katai’s ability to be successful at fulfilling my goals I had considered a lot of options over the past 3-4 years. So, while I was suddenly at the point of being in the market for a new equine partner, I wasn't starting my search from scratch.

I'll always have a soft spot for the underdog, in this case off breeds. I'm also a passionate fan of the smaller horse or pony and I was prioritizing a good brain over everything else. While GRPs are amazing, I'm not confident that I would enjoy riding an extremely athletic pony on a day to day basis and to me it seemed that going with anything more purpose bred, and therefore likely more spicy, would end up similarly to how things went with Katai. While I always enjoyed riding "my little sports car" as I liked to call her, I was hoping for something that was easier, less anxious, and that could take more "mistakes" on my part. 

I had a few breeds on my short list which included stock horses such as a Quarter horse or Paint horse, quiet, native pony breeds such as Fjords, Gypsy Vanners, Fells, and potentially a Welsh or Welsh cross, and also Mustangs which I had fallen in love with based on Elisa Wallace's journey with her horses. Ideally I was looking for something that was of riding age (4-5+), that hadn't been started as a 2-3 year old (or was very lightly started), was between 13.2-15 hands, preferably a mare, with at least decent confirmation, clear gaits, and mostly with a good brain. Ideally I would have taken something a bit older (8-12) that was closer in training to Katai but I knew my budget wasn't big enough for that so I was happy to settle for something unstarted or green.

My budget pretty much meant that unless I found a needle in a haystack, the purebred pony breeds I was interested in wouldn't work at this point so I started with stock horses and mustangs. There were plenty of stock horses on the market but it was tough to find candidates that had decent dressage confirmation that hadn't been ridden into the ground from 2 on. I'm all about doing what's best for each individual horse and, for me personally, don't have anything wrong with lightly starting horses at 3 but I prefer to start them closer to 4-5 and was definitely not looking for a horse that's been working on a sliding stop as a 2 year old.

My search for mustangs was more fruitful. I knew I wasn't in a place to gentle a wild one so I looked at TIP trained mustangs. TIP or the Trainer Incentive Program pays trainers $1000 to get a wild horse trained in typical, domestic handling skills including catching, leading, tying, getting their feet handled, and trailer loading. Most mustangs were in my height range and it was easy to find them in my age range, both for the budget I had. I put my energy into finding a mustang with a solid brain and temperament which is, perhaps, easier than you'd think. I joined a bunch of Facebook groups and ended up reaching out to a trainer about a mustang she had available. She was incredible and honestly told me that the horse she had probably wasn't a good fit for what I wanted but she gave me some leads on where to look. 

Based on her suggestion I joined the Georgia TIP Challenge Facebook group which, in a kismet like turn of events, had just wrapped up that weekend. The horses were all listed on the Facebook page and I was absolutely smitten with a photo of this gorgeous chestnut mare with a wide blaze and two tall hind socks. She had absolutely lovely confirmation and was within, if towards the bottom end, of my height range (13.3ish). The description of her seemed to match what I was looking for so I messaged her trainer that I doubted it but was this horse available, and magically she still was.  We ended up calling each other right then and there. 

The trainer's description of Niall, as this mare was named, was spot on perfect for what I was looking for. She said she was sweet, intelligent, and quiet but with a sensitive side. She had also won the youth portion of that Georgia TIP challenge with a perfect score in handling/horsemanship. Again, it felt like the universe was opening doors for this to happen when the trainer let me know that she was originally from WI, where my current boarding barn is, and that she was home frequently and could trailer the mare at least most of the way to me from TN where she was currently located. The price was right, I did some additional digging into the trainer's background and with that confidence I filled out the paperwork with the Bureau of Land Management to make this official. Then it was time to cross my fingers and wait. 

The Bureau of Land Management, for all that some people don't like the way they manage the mustangs, has lots of protections in place for these horses. Technically, new mustang "owners" are just caring for them for the first year, if they get approved, and don't take ownership until a vet signs off on the animal's care at the conclusion of that year. There are requirements for fencing, paddock size, and housing and I needed to fill out two separate forms with all sorts of information about where she would be kept and how I would feed her etc. Government paperwork is always stressful and slow and it felt way worse while waiting for approval to bring my new horse home but eventually I got the official approval and we made the final plans to transport Niall (yes, I decided to keep her name) up here to my barn. 

Everything was finalized just over a month after Katai went to her new home and then came the long wait for Niall to get here. It was a stressful time as I worried about whether I had made the right decision buying a horse sight unseen off of the word of a trainer, photos, and a short video clip and whether it would work to have a new mustang at a boarding facility. Then there was a one day delay in trailering which added to my stress but eventually they were on the way with a good report that Niall had loaded in the trailer perfectly in the dark at 4am (which feels like a foretelling but that's a story for another day). 

After an 18 hour trailer ride Niall climbed off quickly but nicely at my barn, again in the dark, and walked quietly and calmly, if tiredly, into her new stall. I was thrilled and still am with my decision. She is exactly as her trainer described and exactly what I was looking for in every way. While she is still on the smaller side of what I was looking for, she sticked right at 13.3, she is still perfect for me. Mostly though, I love her brain and her personality. She has this larger than life, goofy personality that I never sought out but absolutely love with her. She's also more on the masculine side of the spectrum in some ways and is mouthy and kind of a punk in a way that I just love. She's also absolutely brilliant and has picked up the routine and expectations at the barn incredibly quickly. 

As anyone that's followed me on Instagram knows there is a lot more to our story together already but this is already long enough so I'll post about that at some point in the future. For now, I'll leave this with a happy heart with Katai in the right place for her and with my heart horse in her stall waiting for me to hand walk her tonight.

Where We Are Now

This past weekend I spent some time hanging
out in Katai's stall with her and cleaned her leather halter

I’ve been writing some blog posts but not posting them because it seems weird to post some pieces of what’s been going on without a full update but by the time I get the full update written the other stuff I wrote is no longer relevant. I do want to post something though because I truly enjoy looking back through the blog and I use it to remind myself of important dates. I’m going to rapid fire some updates but there is a lot more I won’t be able to post. Also, I’m going to try to get back to posting on Instagram more, it’s just been a rough couple of months and the dead of winter in MN is never good for mental health things.

Riding Things:

Last I posted was in July of 2020 and things were going well. I’d been at the “new at the time” barn for a couple of months and was making a ton of progress with riding consistently, riding outside, and gaining back strength after a couple of quiet, less consistent years. Katai was going as well as she ever had thanks to the work I was doing on my own anxiety and the vitamin E that I’d started her on.

Since then, we’ve continued to build strength and through December I was riding super regularly, around 5 times per week on average which is awesome for me. We were schooling second level movements (other than some of the canter stuff) and even had a start on the third level trot work. I was taking remote lessons with Megan from A Enter Spooking around 1-2 times per month and that was SUPER helpful. In December I had two fantastic lessons back to back where we did some half pass and then started picking apart the trot/canter transitions. That work completely broke Katai’s brain but it’s just one of those training things and I suspect we’ll get a similar reaction when we introduce the changes. As of this past week I’ve gotten some truly spectacular trot/canter transitions, they just aren’t that consistent yet but I can tell we’re doing the correct work.

Soundness Things:

I was working through it and we were making progress but at the end of January/early February she started having some body soreness that came out as behavioral stuff in the work. I gave her a bit of time off and got chiro and massage done and switched farriers. This was right around when we had that incredibly long cold front with negative and single digit highs for over 10 days straight though so some of the appointments were delayed and I couldn’t ride for a while. When I went back to it as it warmed up she was off her rocker with energy and, while she was feeling better, she still seemed a little sore. I’d guess that if we’d been able to keep working it would have resolved but all that time spent standing around (even though I was handwalking as often as I could) wasn’t great.

We’ve got her on a four week schedule for massage, I’m treating for ulcers, we’re trying some equipment changes at the suggestion of the body worker (who has a pony mare and rides 4^th level), and her feet are looking better so I’m hopeful that she’ll continue to feel better.

Yep, that barn driveway was glare ice

Mental Health Things:

This definitely took a dip over the early part of the year. Not being able to spend regular time at the barn with Katai and missing out on that physical activity was super difficult especially in the dead of winter. Add to that a significant, horrific, traumatic event that occurred at one of the locations I support for work and I really struggled. I’m feeling a bit better but still pretty flat emotionally which has definitely made getting back to the barn regularly a bit tough. I was out 6 days this past week though and rode four which is awesome and this week should be similar. I’m also super proud of myself that I rode outside on Saturday and Sunday this past weekend. That’s a huge stretch for me since up until this last summer Katai was truly awful to ride outside (I completely take ownership for this but it didn’t make it any easier to deal with) and both days were cool and very windy. We both did well and she really held it together for me.

Upcoming Changes:

I’m moving again. Yep, I know I move a lot and that’s everyone’s first reaction. I’m not going to justify it because I have clear, well thought out reasons but it also sucks. I’ve never wanted to move around this much and would really love to “find my barn” and just stay there forever. In the past, I’ve made some pretty big sacrifices to stay in my budget and distance including less care or missing some amenities I want. With COVID and being reclassified as a remote employee I’m changing it up and trying something new. This time the drive time is what I’m going to sacrifice on. The new barn is about an hour and a half away but since I’m no longer driving for work I’m hoping it will be doable. This has allowed me to find the type of barn I’ve been looking for with the right amenities, care, etc. while still staying within my budget. At some point I’ll have all my debt paid off (being a millennial sucks) and my budget for barns will open up significantly but for now, that’s the most important thing for me to do with my money and thus, my barn budget is much lower than it could be. 

Katai is being moved right on the 1^st of April (no this isn’t an April Fools joke) so that’s coming up quickly and soon you’ll start seeing a different barn in the background in my Instagram pictures. Now I just need to continue with the progress I’ve made over the past year with riding outside and riding regularly.

Planted

I'm back for a post or two! I have truly loved moving to Instagram and find it has been so much easier with my general lack of motivation recently to still journal and interact with my internet friends without having to write long posts. Some things though just need a little more space.

Handgrazing is one of our new, favorite, pastimes 

This year, other those truly awful things we're all aware of, has honestly been awesome for me. Those couple of years where I wasn't riding much have paid off in that I have an amazing and strong relationship with an amazing partner, own a home, and have a job that I adore. Without taking a step back from riding and horse things I don't know that I would have been able to accomplish all of that. Now, I'm able to enjoy the effort that I put into those things but also have time and energy to go to the barn and the motivation to go. 

So far, since I've moved to the new barn, I've made it out there 6 days a week and have been riding 5 days a week pretty regularly. When that doesn't happen, like last week, I get right back on track the following week. It feels so amazing to be going regularly and making progress again. I wasn't riding that regularly even when I was working with Jane. What doesn't always feel great is the slow, steady work of getting both of our strength back but I also have confidence that we'll get there and that doing it the right way will take time.

We've also done a lot of hand walking down the sand track to build confidence.
The cross country course is in the center.

What also feels great is that all the slow work I've done over the past two years has led to better work that I was getting when I was working regularly with Jane. Even though I haven't had regular lessons in the meantime I have been slowly chipping away at things like increasing relaxation and improving me and Katai's partnership as well as managing my anxiety. These things have been working and are now paying off in a big way.

After just about two months at the new barn I'm doing things that I could only dream of before. That includes having productive rides in the outdoor arena(s) where I'm doing about 90% of my rides at this point. No only is she just as engaged and ridable (and relaxed) outdoors now as she was indoors during good rides last year but we can switch which outdoor arena we're in and still get really good work. We're also hacking out by ourselves and even if it's just a short ride down the sand gallop track (at a walk of course) it's HUGE for us.

Hopefully a new phone will mean less blurry screen grabs!

I credit this to me having a better handle on my anxiety and also on all of the relaxation work and team building. That work has helped me but has also helped Katai to have a better sense of humor about things. This barn is BUSY. There are people, trailers, farm equipment, screaming kids, dogs, bikes, you name it all over the place all the time. Katai has done so well that she's one of the favorites of the girls that work at the barn and resident barn rats and they've even told me that "she's pretty near bomb proof" which were not words I EVER expected to hear about Katai.

I'd say I couldn't believe the change but I've truly put blood, sweat, and tears into this especially over the past year so this is really just a lot of hard work paying off. 

Gotta make sure the Pivo is tracking

One of the main shifts for me in how my mindset has shifted is that I feel really planted. In the past I always knew I was moving to a different state and/or moving onto my own farm. It was something I had wanted so badly for so long that I always felt like I had one foot out the door. It didn't feel like it made sense to build a solid team of body workers, vets, saddle fitters, farrier, etc. because I felt like I was "just moving away anyway". It also meant that I was especially picky about board because it felt like I was just managing it until I could move to my own place. In addition, it kept me from really figuring out ways to deal with inconveniences like our weather, boarding things, or bugs. 

With meeting my boyfriend I needed to change that mindset because he loves this place and has never wanted to move. Within the first few months of meeting each other we had a lot of conversations about city vs. farm life and if I could be happy here. It was a decision I took very seriously and put a lot of thought into because I never wanted to feel negatively about him or the relationship because of a decision that was mine to make. In the end, I decided I could be truly happy living in Minneapolis for the rest of my life and honestly it's one of the best decisions I've ever made. 

That planted feeling has led me to finding solutions for things instead of just whining about them. It's led me to working on my anxiety vs. feeling like I could just run away from it. It's also led me to just bucking up and dealing with things like heat or humidity since I can't just move away from it and I don't want the middle of summer and the middle of winter to be excuses to stop riding or making progress.

I've also really dialed in Katai's diet and the Vitamin E is part of
what I credit to her current ability to relax.

Those solutions have led to new tools like cooling towels for the summer and a great water bottle as well as warmer layers and the realization that personally I need to board at a heated barn for winter. They've also led to a strong team of horse professionals around us to help make sure Katai is feeling her best and that I've got the support I need to keep making progress. Finally, one good thing that came out of COVID is the ability to do remote video lessons. For the first time, while I have the money this fall for a truck and was planning to move forward with that and get a trailer next spring/summer I'm actually taking that off my list. Instead I'm going to upgrade my phone for a better camera and processor and figure out how to get the Pivo working for remote lessons or upgrade to something like a Pixio. 

Next year the plan is to find opportunities to ride with people to just a couple of dressage shows. It's not going to be quite as easy to figure out trailer loading stuff without my own but I figure that if I can make it work for a few years and pay off some more debt I'll be in a more comfortable place to get my own in the near future. I'm also just feeling confident enough that Katai will be better at shows with the very show like atmosphere at our barn every day. That helps me feel like I'm not going to need to trailer her out every weekend to get used to it and can instead maybe have a handful of productive shows next year. 

The new dressage arena with fiber footing is <3

Fingers crossed we're in a better place pandemic wise next year and shows are easier and more available than this year!

Options

With my current decision to move I didn't have to think that long to decide which barn I would move to if I could. The barn I'm moving to is one that I've been at before and as soon as I saw their response to COVID I started thinking about what moving might look like. That was back at the very beginning of April and while it still took me about three weeks to get to this point, I didn't shop around for other barns.

However, seeing Viva Carlos' post about barns and barn prices actually surprised me a bit as far as how similar our prices are in MN to those in CA. My budget is around $600 max per month and I've been paying between $375-$570 for the past few years. With lessons I was paying as high as $760 per month at one point. With that being said, we have multiple places over $1000 and at least a couple of places around $2000

For that my list of must haves is:

• No pasture - laminitis stuff with Katai and our pastures around here are SUPER rich. Plus, most barns won't deal with grazing muzzles unfortunately.
• Heated barn
• Trailer parking - because this IS happening sooner or later and I'd rather not need to move in order to park a trailer
• Daily supplement feeding - your girl seriously needs her magnesium
• Within budget
• Daily turnout of at least 8 hours
• Indoor arena
• Outdoor arena - no longer a nice to have since I need to get Katai acclimated to riding outside
• access to other outdoor riding space - even if it's a small trail around the pastures
• Good footing in the arenas
• No road riding to get to trails - it's just too easy for something to go wrong and my anxiety won't deal with it. If it's a quiet gravel road I'd consider but nothing fast and paved
• Ample barn hours
• Within a 40 minute drive
• Uses my favorite vet

Nice to haves:

• Access to some sort of lessons on site
• Great barn community, even better if I could show with a group of other riders
• Heated arena
• Have regular visits by someone that does body work, a saddle fitter, etc.
• Ability to use my tack locker
• Horses are led in and out - this wouldn't be optional except Katai is sensible and slowly walks in like a lady
• More than 8 hours of turnout
• Indoor wash stall, solarium, other nice grooming amenities

With that, let's get into the list! This is a random list of barns that I'm aware of and have considered. These are either primarily dressage or eventing for the most part although at least one or two of these have more western riders than english. 

Barn #1

• Pros: 
• Dressage focused barn
• On site trainer
• Nicely heated grooming space with easy access to a wash stall
• Fantastic footing
• Nicely priced
• Active, showing, dressage barn community
• Cons
• I wouldn't ever ride with this trainer again
• Only pasture turn out and no supplement feeding
• Outside of my ideal drive distance

Price: $500

Barn #2 (wait list barn)

• Pros:
• Onsite gold medalist dressage instructor
• Huge indoor arena with fantastic footing
• Fantastic barn community
• Tons of outdoor riding spaces including a pond
• Active, showing, dressage community
• Cons:
• Right at the top of my current budget for stall board
• I've been on the waitlist for over a year with no movement (both a pro and a con really since no one wants to leave)

Price: $610-$750

Barn #3

• Pros:
• Nice indoor footing
• Everything is under one roof and is well heated
• Great, active boarders, mainly dressage
• Lots of access to onsite trainers
• Cons:
• The outdoor arena footing is terrifying and is plagued with horse flies during the summer
• No trainer I'd want to work with
• It's in the process of changing hands barn manager wise
• No real outdoor riding spaces

Price: $600

Barn #4

It doesn't really show the facility, but how could I not post this arena picture

• Pros:
• Dressage focused facility with onsite trainer
• Fantastic footing
• Gorgeous facilities
• Active, showing, dressage community
• They even do stuff like yoga at the barn
• Top trainers in for clinics
• Cons:
• Out of my budget, clearly
• Requires full training
• Not sure we'd fit in

Price: $1200+ with full training

Barn #5

Yes, those are Moshy ears. This place also holds a summer
show series including the show that I took Moshy to a couple of years ago.

• Pros:
• Clearly this place is gorgeous
• Great footing
• The, or one of the, largest indoor arenas in our area
• I think this is the closest barn to our house at just over 20 minutes away
• Access to onsite dressage instruction
• Cons:
• Clearly out of my budget
• I'm not sure if I'd want to train with the resident dressage trainer
• Not much turnout, maybe half day?
• Not sure that we'd fit in

Price: $1200+ (a lot more) with full training. I'm not certain if they require full training or not. You also must purchase a very premium tack trunk so that they all match.

Barn #6 (Current Barn)

• Pros:
• Easy drive from home
• Major shopping center just across the road for easy errand runs
• Nicely heated barn and connected arena
• Wonderful barn community
• Tons of turnout with almost no stall time other than feeding time during the summer
• Indoor wash stall
• Huge park with horse trails just across the road
• Cons:
• Pasture turnout
• Deep and slippery arena footing
• Very busy small arena
• Not very peaceful since directly across the road is a shooting range
• Lack of communication during COVID stuff
• You have to cross a fast, busy road to get to the trails
• Barn hours of 10am-9pm mean that some days it's tough to get to the barn unless I plan carefully
• Can't use the indoor wash stall except for small things since it doesn't drain well
• Outdoor wash washstall doesn't have heated water

Price: $500-$570

Barn #7 (Where I'm moving)

• Pros:
• Three outdoor riding arenas with an outdoor dressage arena going in this year
• A sand gallop track that can be used for trail riding plus just lots of space to ride around the property
• Access to additional trails
• My favorite vet and massage person go here and they have a saddle fitter in regularly 
• Active barn community with lots of eventers and at least some dressage focused riders
• Access to onsite trainers
• Two indoor arenas, one small heated and a larger unheated
• Good footing. It was good when I was there before, recently they've began the process redoing all their footing and adding some fiber footing to all the arenas. It was in process when I toured but I'm guessing they will be finished with that process by the time I move in.
• Barn has been in business since 1977 with the same owners/managers so lots of stability
• Solarium and fancy grooming area
• I can use my own tack locker
• Cons:
• With ala carte boarding options I'd be over budget if I chose everything I wanted
• Very busy barn with lots of kids and group lessons
• The paddocks are small
• No indoor wash stall
• No dressage focused trainers on site

Price: $475-$710 

Barn #8

No real facility photos so here is the arena

• Pros:
• Dressage focused facility
• Great footing
• Large stalls
• Heated arena
• Onsite dressage instruction
• Fairly close to our house
• Cons: 
• Must be in full training
• Over my budget

Price: $935-$1,150

Barn #9

Yes, this is an actual picture of the facility and not something I pulled off Pintrest lol

• Pros:
• Clearly a gorgeous facility
• Dressage focused
• Multiple dressage instructors
• Premium horse care
• FANTASTIC footing. I've actually been told to attend a schooling show there just to experience their footing lol
• Massive indoor
• Clearly it's fully heated
• Onsite laundry
• They feed three times per day and do night checks for all their horses every night 
• They have packages that include up to a number of sessions (either trainer rides or lessons) that's flexible enough to be palatable to me.
• Who wouldn't want to board someplace like this, I mean seriously?
• Stalls are cleaned multiple times per day and are all 12x14
• Cons:
• Well, clearly it's out of my budget
• Not sure if I can think of any other cons

Price: all of it, everything and your soul. 

Just kidding, it's actually a fairly reasonable $1600-$2000 per month. For $1,600 per month (and let's face it that's still exceptionally expensive and around 3x what I'm paying now) you get up to 10 training sessions per month plus access to all the boarding amenities. For the premium $2000 per month package it includes full grooming (not sure I'd want that) but also has things like braiding for shows, body clipping, up to 20 training sessions per month (that's 5 times per week 0-0) and hand walking. If I were ever to aspire to board someplace over my budget it would be this barn. 

Just because, a few more pictures of that facility.

and then, to close out the post, a few more pictures of the facility I'm moving into.

On site cross country course

From their trail class schooling day

One of the outdoor arenas

The smallest outdoor arena

Dom Schramm teaches at this facility a few times a year. This was from one of the recent clinics.

COVID Horse Life Update Part Three

I can't wait to see this face again.

If you didn't read through the previous two parts of this please review those first. Those are important details into the updates I have for this post and are good perspective into my decision.

First, I can't tell you how much I've been struggling with this over the last month. I also can't emphasis enough how much this doesn't have to do with not being able to see Katai right now, and how much it does have to do with the lack of communication, poor communication, and lack of any sort of transparent plan regarding the barn closure. I'd also seen shortcuts taken that, when I could be there all the time, didn't concern me but those certainly started to eat at me when I couldn't be there. With that, two things really struck me over the past week that ultimately really made the decision for me.

First, my poor, amazing boyfriend has been listening to me process this and worry about any and all options. He's quietly talked me through it and been so amazingly supportive. Pretty early on he supported me moving Katai, partially because I think he understands how much my mental health is tied to this decision and is fantastic at supporting me through advocating for myself. I've been the one really hesitating to move in that direction. During yet another night of me being emotional and second guessing myself he said something that has really stuck with me. Basically I was talking about how awesome my barn owner had been when other people had horse emergencies and how she was such a nice person. I was feeling awful for even thinking about moving and he said something along the lines of "Just because she's amazing, doesn't mean she's the right fit for you right now". It really struck me in that the barn isn't awful, the owner isn't awful, no one is a villain here, it's just that with the unprecedented things we're dealing with right now, things have significantly shifted and what was amazing before, isn't necessarily amazing right now.

I'm jealous of those of you who can't see your horse right now but know that they're receiving amazing care. I'm jealous of those of you who have your own property and can continue to see, care for, and even ride your horse(s) through this time, I'm jealous of those of you that are at barns that have taken appropriate steps for social distancing and are listening to the science while allowing you to continue to see your horses and ride.

At any rate, I FINALLY came to the decision to move. The deposit has been paid to the new(ish) barn, notice has been given, and I'm planning to move in the middle of May pending final trailer arrangements.

So, where am I going? It's actually a barn I've been at before back in the winter of 2014/2015. This is the barn where I escaped to from the awful trainer that was my first dressage instructor. At the time I NEEDED an onsite trainer since I needed lessons and didn't have a trailer. Because of that, I didn't stay long but loved it there and the only negative I can remember is that I wasn't in a heated barn and it was the middle of winter so it was super cold.

This is the larger, unheated arena that's in the unheated barn I boarded in.

The people were lovely and it has super amenities. Since I left they also replaced all of the footing with a fiber/sand mix and made some other property improvements. I'll also get some additional "amenities" by being in the heated barn including that, well, there's heat and Katai will get led in rather than ran in like my current barn and this unheated barn. They also have a solarium that I'm super excited to use.

This was in the unheated barn. I think her stall was just to the right of this picture.

I actually have had this barn on my list for awhile and was going to move back just prior to when I moved to Jane's. I was so confident that I was going to move back at that point that I even started on the tack locker project with my dad. This is the only barn I'm aware of in the area that will allow you to have a tack locker. In the meantime, my dad has been kind enough to store the locker but I'm going to pick it up in May, finally get the exterior painted, and get that moved up there. I can't wait to finally start using it.

Tack locker in progress from back 2017/2018

Then, when I was leaving my previous barn and going to my current barn I was planning to move there again until my friend at the current barn invited me out for a visit and I fell in love with her facility and knew a few people there. It feels in some way like I've come full circle and found my way back.

I also really enjoyed reading through L. Williams Viva Carlos post about the barns in the area so while I didn't technically shop around I thought I might do a post about barns, what they offer, and what they check off my list. In the long run, I'm STILL on the waitlist for dream barn and after checking in earlier this month it sounds like there hasn't been any movement since February 2019 when I got on the waitlist. I figure either I'll love it here and decide to stay long term or I'll move there when the spot opens up. I really hadn't planned to move again before a spot opened up there but it turns out we're living through something that's changing plans everywhere so it's not too unexpected that I'd need to revise my plans.

COVID Horse Life Update Part Two

I also picked up some pretty new things on sale from our local tack shop.
I'm doing what I can to #shopsmall and support our local businesses right now.

I feel like everything in life right now requires a difficult decision. Even going out for a run, I need to pick a route that I think won't have too many people and constantly watch and be alert to dodge people as I go while also watching for traffic and lumps or bumps in the sidewalk so I don't hurt myself. It's uncomfortable and tough to zone out and just run.

My anxiety has made shopping difficult because people aren't good at following rules so it's almost impossible to avoid coming within 6' of someone at the store as everyone mills around. That's with MN taking this pretty seriously and doing a good job social distancing overall so far. I can't imagine what it would be like in a place where it wasn't being taken as seriously.

Nothing has felt like a more difficult decision than horse stuff though. Being completely blunt, my options were to stay, cross my fingers, and hope that the barn opens to some extent or the communication gets better or go and have to deal with all of the ickiness that is trying to move a horse during this quarantine while leaving my current barn family at this time.

Not any sort of official advice but cute and funny and still good things to consider.

I knew if I moved that some people would feel like I had moved just so I could ride my horse. We're all in this together and I understand that many people can't ride or see their horse right now. I also knew that I couldn't make the decision based on other's opinions. As horse owners we are all responsible for our own horse, ourselves, and for doing the best that we can for each of them. Sometimes we're going to mess up and look back and wish we had done things differently, sometimes we're going to get it exactly right, and sometimes it's going to be somewhere in the middle.

I'm incredibly anti risk. I'm not an adrenaline junky, I drive at or below the speed limit, I lunge if Katai seems anxious or especially high energy, and with this quarantine I'm staying 99% home with my boyfriend and only ordering food because other than a handful of times that we've needed to leave over the last month+ for truly essential purchases I don't want to leave the house. We've purchased masks (from Equifit actually :), found some hand sanitizer that I've ordered, and are carefully following the science as far as social distancing (those few times we go out), hand washing, and washing/disinfecting our groceries as appropriate. With that, while I'm tempted to just completely hide at home until this passes, none of us can or should completely stop our lives for the next 18+ months. That certainly has its own dangers including, for many of us, mental health decline. Instead, I believe in following the science, reducing risk to the smallest possible amount, and following all guidance in things like our Stay at Home order.

Also taking full advantage of every dressage learning opportunity include this webinar series that Meghan from
A Enter Spooking has put together!

I'm exhausted from all of the decision making and at first just buried my head in the sand and waited it out. However, I also knew that with our current peak expected around the end of June-mid August and the likelihood of additional waves following that, this concern I have about my barn isn't just going to go away in the next month. My boyfriend and I have had a long talk about horse and barn options since we've found that he's not as high risk as was originally thought. So, as we move forward and find out about the next steps for both our stay at home order and any updates from the science community on what we should all be doing we're also moving forward in appropriate ways.

I've considered a bunch of options and have some plans that I'm working to finalize. My BF is working to build an at home climbing wall and we're going to continue to stay 100% at home for the time being.