So, I was all set to write about my rides on Monday and last night and get it posted today but then this happened on my way to work this morning.
Unlike the conga line that SprinklerBandits was in I was the middle car. I hit the car ahead of me when I put my foot on the brakes and nothing happened. It was so slick that I might as well have been in a skating rink and it was a good thump but not horrible impact but then the car behind me slammed into me with enough force to push me past the car in front of me and sideways so that it looked like the car I hit T-boned me.
It was a typical MN car accident with all three people involved apologizing and being sweet and caring about it. The cop also had a great sense of humor and when he almost wiped out on the slippery spot, as he was picking up pieces of my car, he looked right at me, pointed at the spot, and with a straight face said "It's kind of slippery right there". It made me crack up anyway.
Unfortunately my roommate and I both think they may total my car. I just got it about a year ago and it's a newer model with very few miles so it really sucks. Plus I love it. The good thing is that it kept me safe. I'm slightly sore but not too bad, I hurt more after trying to trailer load Katai actually...
So, after my last post on how motivated I'm feeling I was all excited to ride every day this weekend. I took Monday off, to celebrate my birthday, and was looking forward to a good three rides in a row. Then I woke up on Saturday, put on my riding clothes, looked at my watch and realized that it was 2* out. I looked at the forecast and the high was around 6* with a windchill of -2* all day.
I just about cried. I could probably suck it up, put on my warmest clothes, and with the help of the "hopefully" heated arena I could possibly stay warm enough during my ride haha. However, I just don't think it's fair to Katai to ask her to work in the cold like that. It's not easy on tendons and ligaments or her respiratory system. At the very least since this was our very first really cold day and it was a major drop from the 30s that we were getting just about a week ago I felt like I really needed to at least give her some time to adjust. Then at the very least I could just do a lot of walking. In the end I stayed home and made myself a vegan birthday feast instead.
I was excited because Sunday had a forecast high of 23* so I figured I'd ride then. There was some snow forecast but the weathermen rarely get that right so I figured I'd be ok. However, We ended up getting at least 6" and since it was still quite cold (it never made it up to 23*) the chemicals they put on the road weren't working very well and it was extremely slippery. I made a trip to Target in the afternoon and felt like I was taking a risk with my life. I love my tiny, itty bitty car, until we get weather like this. So, I stayed home. The snow finally stopped around 9:00pm and after shoveling our driveway at least 3-4 times we still ended up with more snow overnight.
This was part way through the day, we ended up with at least another inch. At least it's pretty!
Then, I was all excited to ride on Monday, my day off. It had been forecast to be 18* (remember that thing about the weathermen always being wrong?) but it was 3* when I woke up and the high today is still in the single digits with a wind chill around 2* as a high. Plus we're supposed to get more snow later.
Even for MN this is usually cold and snowy which is what the Farmer's Almanac told us it would be like this year. I honestly don't quite know what I'll do if the whole winter is like this and since historically January and February are our really cold months I'm really starting to wonder how much worse it will get.
This was last year on my birthday. Not a bit of snow and I'm wearing a sweatshirt
I am still planning to head to the barn this afternoon as long as the snow doesn't start until the late afternoon/evening like they're forecasting (remember that thing about weathermen) but I likely will stick to walk and possibly a little trot depending on how stiff she is and how warm the arena is.
Winter is always tough on my motivation. The seasonal change is the worst but the depression and headaches that always gives me seems to be over this year which is amazing. The winter is just tough because of the dark and cold.
At my previous barn it wasn't so bad since it was kept much warmer, closer to 50-60* so as soon as I got to the barn I was comfy and could wear just a light jacket. This barn is much chillier and probably kept closer to 32* just so it doesn't freeze. Certainly not complaining but as a huge freeze baby I have to admit that it's been tougher to make myself go to the barn this year.
Especially when we have weeks like this in early December
I've still been to the barn 3-4 days a week but I'm still aiming for 5 so that's a big difference. However on Tuesday H was able to make it to my lesson and it was an interesting evening that somehow left me feeling more motivated.
To start this off I want to preface by saying that I love H. She's been a friend since I was in my teens and she's really a good person. I really enjoy spending time with her especially since both of us are into dressage ponies so we have a lot to talk about. The thing is though, that she brings out all of my insecurities. That's not her fault but mine for letting who she is get into my head.
H is really a triple threat, she's gorgeous, petit, a beautiful rider, and (the toughest for me to deal with) she rides at an absolutely amazing barn with an absolutely amazing instructor where she regularly gets the opportunity to bop around on a 4 year old Gold Premium filly, a schoolmaster(ish) level horse, and ride with clinicians like Janet Foy.
It's not the fact that I feel insecure around her because I really don't and we both have our own strengths. It's more that I'm jealous of her opportunities. Even as a kid she had a well trained pony, good instruction, and a trailer when I had a green broke and naughty horse that had only been on trail rides, no good instruction, and no trailer so no way to show or take lessons since there weren't any trainers nearby that had lesson horses. Every time I'm around her it's tough for me not to wish I had had the same opportunities in the past and that I could have the same opportunities now since I still don't have a trailer or a trainer who regularly shows throughout our region.
Don't get me wrong. At this point I would never trade and lesson with her instructor (who's a well known dressage judge) instead of Jane. He is amazing but I am at exactly the right place for me and Katai right now and I wouldn't move even if I could. It's just tough every time I see or hear about her scribing and/or showing at large rated dressage shows and talking about all of the quirky show things or partying with our regions top riders after the show.
This time was especially difficult on me because her instructor, who's also a well respected breeder (as you can tell since he has a 4 year old Gold Premium filly that I believe he produced), has recently purchased no fewer than SIX GRPs. Two are older (3 and 6 I believe), four of them are just babies, and H will have the chance to play with, help break, train, and ride all of those gorgeous ponies.
One of them in particular hurts because she's a Golden State baby (from the same barn/lines(?) as Forest Nymph) who I was drooling over for weeks before I heard she went to H's trainer. Of course I'm glad she's in such a good home and excited to meet her at some point but it still stings a bit. The fact that H was talking about all the ways that her trainer thinks this pony might be lacking for upper level dressage (obviously extremely nit-picky things since he has a Gold Premium baby) made it sting more especially since I have an amazing but free pony, with no specific breeding, no traceable bloodlines, and not even close to "fancy" movement. Insecurities talking again of course since I CERTAINLY wouldn't trade Katai even if the pony were offered to me tomorrow for free. Katai is amazing, she's my girl and my partner and she's really what I want.
In the end, after already feeling like H had been a bit condescending about my ride during my lesson (those damn insecurities talking again) I had an emotional drive home. I was completely aware of how silly I'm being. I mean talk about a bunch of first world problems! I have a pony I adore, a trainer I love, and a barn that felt like home the moment I walked through the door and here I'm disappointed that I'm not at a show barn and don't have a 5 figure GRP. Even I know it's funny, it's the fact that H has all of that and she's about 6 years younger than me that leaves me feeling like all the air got knocked out of me.
I processed the whole way home coming up with all of the above conclusions and finally, about 10 minutes from home realized that action is the best thing. Instead of feeling jealous or less motivated I need to just get my butt to the barn, work extremely hard and make opportunities for myself. I need to stop allowing myself to run out of motivation and go to the barn 3-4 days a week and just go and ride my pony! I need to start working out again so that I have the strength to give her a good ride (I died a bit at my lesson on Tuesday which didn't help), and I need to make getting a trailer this year a priority. This isn't about saving up and getting a fancy pony for me (even though I want(ed) Galaxy so badly that it hurts), it's really about wanting more opportunities. Not to win, but at least to get out there and show and to continue to climb up the levels and that's something I just need to work for.
I've been fascinated as I'm reading the blogs on this blog hop and decided that I needed to blog this one. What an amazing idea from Sara!
I'm located in St. Paul, MN and Katai is boarded at a barn that's about half an hour north of downtown.
From Rock the Garden this year
I've grown up in MN and lived here my whole life so although I grew up on a farm more than an hour north of the Twin Cities I'm very familiar with the MN horse community. As far as costs it's not bad. I actually think that based on some of the other blogs on this hop our board seems a little pricy in comparison to hay/farrier/vet prices but because it gets so cold here most of the "nice" boarding barns have heated indoor arenas and need to feed a lot of hay and grain to keep weight on horses along with more limited turnout in the middle of winter which means more shavings so I guess it makes sense.
Previous barn but it's a pretty picture
Trim-$35-$50
Shoes-$120+ for all four, the farrier I use would charge $80 for the fronts and $120 for all four
Average cost of a month of full time training- $500-$700 not including board
Average monthly pasture board- $250-$400
Average monthly stall board- $400-$1200 (I pay $350)
Round bale, mixed grass- $30-$60
Square bales, orchard grass- $3.75-$7.00 per bale
Yep, that road is actually glare ice
Weather: Is not good. In the winter we routinely, from about December - March, have sub zero temps. During January and February we can have a wind chills as low as -30* on the regular. Fall and spring are often rainy and stormy and we do get tornados although they are rare (very glad we don't need to deal with more of the big nasty storms). The summers are muggy and still get quite hot. In a normal summer we'll get above 100 for a week or two. Nothing compared to more southern climates but the jump between winter and summer is so large that you never really get a chance to get used to the heat. Plus the humidity makes it dangerous much more quickly than a more dry heat. We can't ride when it's above the mid to upper 80s, for the most part, because of this.
Most horses do pretty well in the cold especially with stalls overnight and smart blanketing. Mostly it's just miserable to get in your car in the dark, after work when it's -10*, drive the half hour to the barn, get groomed, tacked up and ready to ride in the heated barn (heated to 35-40*) and then ride in a heated arena (usually heated to 20-30*). It certainly makes motivation tough when you're basically operating in a freezer for 3 or so hours.
Twins Baseball Stadium from this summer
We don't have any really icky bugs or wildlife. There are rattlesnakes in places but they're rare. Near the barn there are black bears, wolves, coyotes etc but not much that's dangerous to the horses.
The riding demographic is primarily western, as reflected by our horse expo and most big horse shows. With that being said the twin cities has a decent dressage community as well as a eventing and hunter/jumper community. I'm more involved in the dressage community so it seems like more people do dressage than jumping but that might just be based on my slightly skewed perspective.
Large, fancy eventing facility complete with RV
We have several well attended rated shows in the twin cities area and also most people trailer to Mason City Iowa for the rated shows they hold there. We have some fairly big name clinicians that visit such as Janet Foy, and Jen Truett and I'm sure I'm missing some others as well. Our shows are usually well attended but we have a lack of true upper level riders. At most shows I've been to, everyone gathers to watch the 1-2 people showing above 3rd. The bigger rated shows are more well attended but even then, there really aren't many people at 3rd or above.
We have excellent vet care. There are three big vet clinics in the twin cities including the UofM vet clinic which is able to provide many diagnostic and emergency services. We also have several well known smaller clinics and vets that are very horse savvy.
We also have some great tack stores especially compared to some of the states that I've visited. One of my favorites is right near my barn and the other is near H's barn so I make the trek over there when I want more shopping opportunities.
So much snow!
The most frustrating thing for me is the weather/bugs. In the summer between the sudden intense humid heat waves, horrible mosquitoes/horseflies, rain, storms, etc. it's tough to enjoy riding outside very much of the time. There are brief times in spring and fall when it's nice but otherwise it's tough.
I also wish that english riding styles were more well represented. It's frustrating to go to our horse expo and find maybe 1-2 booths out of over around 100 that actually have nice english type gear or to find more presenters/clinicians that cover english disciplines.
Other than that I like it here! I would say that since I don't deal with the heat well and there isn't such a thing as an air conditioned arena, I'd rather be someplace cold with heated arenas than someplace much further south.
Katai has been perfecting her judgmental expression
Since I haven't posted in awhile but still want to sort of track what I'm learning I thought I'd post a few of the themes that we've been working on and then dig into the specifics as needed later.
Position:
Sit back! Shoulders back but mainly belly button back. I have a fair amount of forward curvature to my spine from my hips to my rib cage so I need to focus on pulling my belly button back and straighten my back more so I can really sit on my seat bones.
I need to carry my hands more forward in front of me. I also need to focus on holding (as needed) with my right hand and releasing (when appropriate) with my left hand since that's opposite what they want to do. I also found out that I also carry my left hand out, off the neck and my right hand against the neck but not enough for correct bend to the left (needs more) and opposite what I should be doing for the correct bend to the right. To correct this (since Katai is white) Jane wants me to think about getting white paint on the hand that's on the outside and keeping the inside hand clean.
I also tend to open my fingers when I want to give forward rather than giving from my elbows.
We've also found that I grip with the back of my calf on my right leg when I use my leg and need to use the inside of my leg instead and keep my toe pointed forward. I've been working on strengthening those muscles so that it's easier. Currently I'm too tired to continue to do this correctly through my entire lesson.
I've always known that I have a tough time sinking my weight through my left stirrup. We've discovered that I'm not weighting my left seat bone equally with the right. This causes me to drop my shoulder when turning/bending Katai to the right since I'm uncomfortable sinking my weight into that seat bone.
Trail walk on a nice sunny day
Movements:
We've added lengthenings and I need to focus on pushing without quickening my posting tempo as well as giving forward from my elbows slightly.
We've also started doing some sitting trot. The main focus here has been on my position (above) and on controlling the bounce to control the temp and "bouncing" straight up and down instead of forward and back.
I'm really excited that we've added shoulder in and that we're doing it at the sitting trot! I mainly can feel this one (it's way easier for me than leg yield) but I need to focus on my position and shoulder vs hip angle. I also need to use my outside rein correctly to keep her moving forward and not let her get the angle too steep. Mainly though I need to sit back and keep my weight on my seat bones.
Canter is still coming along. I haven't been riding enough canter so when I get to my lesson we both get tired out pretty quickly. I mainly need to work on strength so that we can start to do more fun things than 20 meter circles and straight around the track of the arena. My seat continues to get better here and when she's not too tired her transitions from trot and tempo are really good.
First snow this year!
Partnership:
I've seriously learned so much about me and Katai and how we should function as a team from Jane since I've been working with her :) I made an offhand comment about how even though she could be sassy, I loved how steady and un-spookable she was during a ride where the snow was falling off the arena roof. Jane quickly pointed out that she doesn't actually think Katai is sassy. Just that she's a high achiever and when she's confused she lets us know and really wants to get it right. It's crazy how altering my thoughts about Katai and helping me think about her behavior in a different light completely changes how we interact.
I'm continuing to chew on some of this and alter my interactions with her. It's also weird to switch from her being a "baby" horse that doesn't know anything with me as the expert to a true partnership. I'm getting there for the most part but sometimes it's still tough to process.
Me:
I've been feeling a bit better. As the seasonal change has quieted down a bit and I've been more diligent about paying attention to how much vitamin D I'm getting it's been better. I also moved! I'm not sure if I'd previously mentioned this but my grandma moved to an apartment closer to my parents and they offered me a really amazingly low rate of rent to stay at her house and keep an eye on things. It's about 10 minutes closer to the barn and the exact same distance from work plus it's in a nicer neighborhood and I only have one roommate. I think the change in scenery is helping a bit as well. At any rate, it's certainly not hurting.
I'm also participating in the Equestrian Blogger Gift Exchange this year which is really exciting! I've been doing some sleuthing and ordered a couple of things during Black Friday. I'm looking forward to sending it out!
Unfortunately I'm still not feeling 100% and have been having a really tough time staying motivated to ride or blog or do much of anything really. Work is also going to be getting really busy over the next couple of months complete with a couple more trips to WA so I'm still not sure exactly how much I'll be able to post. I'm going to try to have more posts in December but I'll see how things go over the next few weeks.
We're still alive and things are swinging right along. Basically just more of the same from before actually which is good since the improvement is continuing right along.
I've been quiet for a few reasons. One is that my seasonal depression has been worse this year. I'm going to be getting myself a sun lamp since the vitamin D just doesn't seem to be cutting it anymore. That combined with the fact that I just don't have much to write about from a riding standpoint has meant that I just haven't been at all motivated to blog. Worse, it's been depressing to sit down to type a blog and just have all the same stuff to share. I also spent last week in WA for work. FLSA regulation changes are no joke people ;) I had a great trip and it was beautiful there. It increased my interest in finding a way to move out there!
After awhile writing about lessons (even though they've been amazing), training rides (which have mostly been amazing), and not much else gets old. I don't have a good place to ride outside and this weekend we're supposed to be getting our first winter storm. I still don't have a trailer so I can't sign up for any clinics or shows and since I live in the north our show season is completely done.
Not trying to depress anyone, it's just that I'm sort of stuck right now. This is ok with me, actually I think it's really good. I'm making so much progress with Jane that it's sort of like winter bootcamp :) It's mainly just that it's not very exciting to write about or probably to read about.
I do have a few things that I have in mind for the winter.
One of those is that Suzanne will be back in town teaching a couple of clinics at my previous barn over the winter. I think it would be a good, positive trip for Katai so I'm going to plan on that.
I also plan to do a good amount of shopping for Christmas and will be sharing my Christmas "hauls" as I get them, or as I "open" them.
Also, I'll be posting a year end, recap and goals for next year.
Otherwise though, for the time being I'm going to be taking a little blogging hiatus. It's just tough to have content to share that I'm excited about. My goal is to really work hard this winter and then do many shows/events next year to help Katai get comfortable with it. That will be way more interesting for everyone and I'll have more content to share.
In the meantime I've been posting more to Instagram so if you want to keep up with pony adventures feel free to follow me there @kataipony https://www.instagram.com/kataipony/
First of all I wanted to post my previous improvement video
Secondly I have this video from my ride (early this year or late last year?) in the dressage clinic that I participated in as well as footage from one of my recent rides.
A few things to note:
- while I feel like my upper body has gotten way better, as has my posting (oh boy), my leg has gotten worse haha. It's extremely difficult for me to round my back and still keep my leg back. I'm doing hip flexor stretches but honestly I'm not sure if that's the issue since I need to do contortions to actually feel a stretch and tend to be a fairly flexible person.
- The most recent footage was taken after I finished cantering, gave Katai a walk break, and went back to trot. She's being very good but there's definitely more tension than normal and she's not nearly as through as she gets in my rides with Jane.
- because Katai is so tense I'm riding a bit defensively so I don't think my leg is normally quite that bad and I'm posting ahead more than I have been recently
- I'm not quite sure what happened to my posting diagonals. It's a huge pet peeve of mine and I'm normally correct about 95% of the time. However, we've been using this as a tool for the leg yields so that it's easier for me to effect the correct hind leg and as soon as we started doing that I started messing them up.
- OMG we look so much better. Katai is so much more consistent in the contact, her rhythm has slowed down enough that I can actually ask her for things and I don't feel like she's just running away all the time. I'm improving too but I'm disappointed to see how badly my chair seat is back. It's also tough to see some of the improvements in my posture since I chose to wear the puffiest vest I own during this ride and didn't think to take it off for the video
- Also, this isn't cutting out bad moments. What you are seeing here was the worst part of the ride since before we cantered Katai was much more relaxed and through. The cuts are just to keep this a decent length and to cut out the time we spent off camera.
Finally, I'm so proud of us! We've been making good changes since that clinic ride in the video but the majority of this improvement has happened over the past month or two. I can't wait to see where we are this next spring!
I'm not happy with our weather right now. Spring and Fall when our weather changes and the pressure changes I always end up with bad migraines. This year in particular there have been so many swings back and forth that it feels like my head will never feel normal again. I've been tired, crabby, and in pain which has led me to not feel motivated to blog or to ride. Also with the recent FLSA change, which is going into effect on December 1st, and other year end things work has been crazy. With all of that I've been setting a goal to ride 4 days per week rather than 5.
For the most part Katai has been fine with that but today between still being madly in heat (seriously weather just go away. It's ok to be warm, or to be cold but please make up your mind) and a less consistent riding schedule she was full of spice.
I feel like we're living in England with this cold rainy weather
Also, she really wasn't bad, at all, but I also had my trainer hat on and so I was pushing things a bit more than normal. I feel like around once a week I really feel up to being a real thinking rider and actively training. Clearly I'm aware that I'm training her ever ride and I'm always working on things but this was one of those rides where I went into the ride knowing that I was going to push her a bit. For this ride that meant changing up the normal routine a bit more. It probably wasn't a good time to do that when I knew she was in heat but meh, it ended up being a great thing.
To start I got her into a good trot. She normally doesn't get as through until after she canters but she felt really good today. Because she felt so good early in the ride I asked for canter fairly quickly. She went into the canter pretty nicely but started off on the incorrect lead, my fault. I fixed it and did a good amount of canter on 20 meter circles and straight down the long side. After I really felt that she was on my aids and going well I went to trot across the diagonal and then towards the end went to leg yield and right into canter in the other direction once I hit the wall. Video below, I can really see some improvement!
In that transition she didn't do anything naughty but porpoised slightly as we went which she hasn't been doing at all so I knew she was feeling tight and extra full of energy. That was her tougher side so I got about as much canter but it wasn't quite as good as in the other direction and then back to trot. I gave her a walk break and then back to trot.
She was a bit tight to start off (she still doesn't think she should have to trot after we canter, my fault for always letting her be done after we cantered) but after a couple of serpentines and leg yields she loosened up. At that point I actually went back to canter which she did really, really well. She went right into the transition, very nicely. I was actually kind of impressed with just how nicely she cantered.
Slightly failed experiment with taking phone pictures
Very happy with that hind leg!
After another walk break I asked her to go back to trot, which I knew would mess with her, and she was quite hot, tense, and sassy. Clearly I was completely incorrect in asking her to do that since Katai knows much more about how our riding plan works :)
However, she did get nice and stretchy and felt great. She was stretching down and listening so I went to do a walk transition but didn't want to give her the reins right away. I hadn't put tons of thought into it, just knew that I can't keep just giving the reins away when I bring her back to walk. That really messed with her and she lost the remainder of her pony mind. She jigged, jogged, pranced, and started rearing. Major sass attack time.
Taking pictures with my apple watch
Children, don't Watch and Ride
There are times when I would just have called it after an amazing canter, or amazing trot but I can't keep doing that every time. Sometimes she has to just be an adult and my plan had been to have her take about three steps with some contact and then let it go and be done. Since she spazzed out though we ended up with another 5-6 minutes of riding and sassing with me talking to her, staying calm and relaxed, and trying to get her brain back between her ears.
I wasn't asking for much contact and eventually she did a good job of walking and relaxed a bit and then I really pushed my luck and asked for another halt/walk transition and she walked off softly with contact so I was done.
I was really proud of how I handled it and the progress that we made and I know that I need to just keep chipping away at this little monster I created with following too much of a routine.
Because I haven't been blogging regularly I feel like I've just got all sorts of random life and pony updates. Lucky you, I'm going to just dump them all in one post and then try to get back on the blogging bandwagon over this next week or so.
Katai has adjusted so well to the new barn. She was right back to herself in very little time. I think that she enjoys the quieter environment. I actually have realized how much I enjoy it as well. I've always enjoyed the social aspect of being at the barn. I enjoy talking horses with people and I always feel more motivated to ride when there are other people there. However, knowing that I'll always have the arena to myself and that there won't be people watching means that I have an easier time concentrating on my riding and Katai rather than what other people are doing which is amazing.
Hussy mare is pretty sure she's in love
with Serenade, her neighbor mare
Jane is absolutely amazing! She provides really good, individualized care to all of the horses. What's really nice is that she treats them all almost like they're her own. She really loves Katai and treats her that way. Katai clearly is already very attached to her which is amazing and brings a really good feeling to our lessons where I can tell how much Jane cares about both of us having fun and enjoying our ride. She is able to really strike a good balance between pushing me and being very direct while still making it fun and lighthearted. For some reason (I think because of how reasonable and reassuring she is) my lesson anxiety (that I've had for my whole life with both music and riding lessons) is completely gone. I've never felt better about going to a lesson that I do right now with Jane.
I was going to do a lesson recap on the specific things that we covered on Tuesday but instead I'm going to just dump it here because again, it's more of the same. I'm sure everyone is probably getting tired of reading about how much we're improving, how amazing Jane is, how I can't believe how much progress we're making blahblahblah but that was still the case at this week's lesson.
For the first time we really NAILED the leg yield and got that amazing floating consistent trajectory feeling. We also had NO tantrums about canter transitions even though she was in absolutely raging heat. None, not a single bit of pony tantrum. I seriously don't know what magic Jane is working but it's amazing and worth way more than she charges. We also did a ton of canter in each direction and only had one break down to a trot. Plus, again no anticipating or almost no anticipating of the trot-canter transitions. I was so, so, so proud.
Rough water on Lake Superior
As for my personal life, it's been a weird week. I had taken a four day weekend, Saturday-Tuesday this past weekend so new guy and I had a road trip planned up to Duluth, MN. Unfortunately things didn't work out between us but the shit didn't hit the fan until we got to Duluth and spent a few hours walking around and shopping. At that point we had to endure a nearly 3 hour drive back home. It was an emotional car ride. I was, and am, sad and upset that things didn't work but I'm also proud of myself and how I handled things. In the past I would have just bit my tongue, pouted quietly and then dealt with it very passive aggressively once I got back so the fact that I handled it directly and yet politely was a big thing for me. My mom also has a great way of putting things into perspective and reminded me that this is exactly why trips like this are so important while dating since it causes issues to show up when it's easier to deal with, early on.
It was a dark and stormy day even before we decided we weren't a good fit for eachother
The nice thing was that I then had a couple of days at home Monday and Tuesday which I basically spent recovering since I was mentally exhausted and, I think, also was fighting off a cold. I don't normally go to the barn on Monday but did end up going to my lesson on Tuesday as planned (see above). I mainly try to leave all of this relationship stuff out of my blog for reasons like this. However, I was really confident that it was going to work in the first couple of weeks and then very confident that it wouldn't during this road trip and I don't want to hide the big things in my life either. It's a tough balance and I'll probably handle it differently next time. Live and learn.
The reason I brought up future plans is that part of what was so good about this guy and the reason that I was so excited to have found him is that he had very similar goals in life as I do. Then I was going to share that on this blog and realized that since I really haven't talked about it that wouldn't mean much to anyone here. Since this is already kind of a dump post I figured I'd just stick it here.
So, as mentioned I grew up on a farm. I was incredibly lucky to be able to have horses, goats, bunnies, ducks, etc. and yet I always just wanted to live in the city. However, even though I wanted to live in the city I never doubted that I'd end up in the country again with my own piece of land. It was simply too amazing to be able to care for my own horses my own way for me to board for the rest of my life.
I do love living in the city, pretty much everything about it actually, and I LOVE boarding. It's great to be able to take vacations whenever I want and not to worry about having to do chores when it's -20* out. So, while I'm not in a huge hurry, there's also no doubt in my mind that at some point I want to have my own little farm and a small herd of ponies.
My dream location would be somewhere closer to the west coast. I don't have my heart absolutely set on it but I'd LOVE to be near Portland somewhere. My goal would be to own about 5 acres with a very small european style barn and some really nice large, dry lots with great drainage since ponies can't have much grass. Also, a nice track around the property for trail riding, a nice trailer, very nice fencing, a comfortable heated tack room with washer and dryer and... I could just keep going. There are lots of places that I feel I could be very happy, including near where I live now, but that would be the dream scenario.
Who wouldn't want this perfect tiny kitchen?
As far as living quarters for me (seriously who really thinks about anything outside of the barn) I've wanted a tiny house since before Tiny Houses were so popular. I never really planned or wanted one on wheels but I was going to either build a small apartment in my barn (who wouldn't want to feed the horses in their pajamas) or just a very small house. While I'm still considering a barn apartment I'm also getting very fond of the idea of building a tiny house on a trailer because of the freedom that would give me and also the cost. I'm working hard to get rid of debt and really don't want to turn right around and get myself back in debt. I'd like to have these things before I'm 40 but I also have way too much college debt from my master's degree so I'm trying to be reasonable as well.
Absolutely perfect
Of course not many other people want this mix of things or actually don't want/can't have this sort of life. This guy used to live in OR as a kid and wanted to go back, he actually initiated the conversation about living in a tiny house because I had basically given up on finding someone that wanted that. He also wanted a small piece of property, loved animals, didn't want kids, etc. It was amazing until it wasn't and I'm sad and still sort of dealing with it.
The good thing is that it really pointed out to me what I find most important in life.
No new pictures of Katai so you're getting some of Veggie at the dog park
Last night I had one of my best lessons to date. Katai seems to be switching to winter mode which for her means that she sweet, sleepy, compliant, and very, very fuzzy of course.
I like winter pony!
She was all blinky and relaxed and happy when I pulled her out of her stall so I was looking forward to a great lesson. She stayed really happy through being tacked up and normally if she’s going to be fussy she shows it when I put her saddle or her bridle on. Since she was still just perky eared and soft eyed I knew we’d have a good lesson.
As soon as we started at a walk I started getting her to stretch down and right away Jane commented that she seemed very relaxed but did seem a little stiff. Because of that Jane had me start off doing some leg yield at the walk. I was having a tough time balancing the aids on both sides of her body so she would either fall sideways with no forward or I’d get lots of forward without getting her to cross her legs at all. Jane worked with me a bit and then had me move up to trot.
I was still having similar struggles and Katai was so relaxed that she kept falling back to walk so I felt like I had to over-ride which wasn’t helping anything so Jane had me switch exercises.
He's just the cutest!
First at the walk and then the trot Jane had me do the long diagonal switching between riding the diagonal straight and doing it in a leg yield. We discovered that the reason that I can’t balance my aids is that I’m pulling the outside leg off, like literally hovering it in the air like a wing. After I started to leave it on her we started to get somewhere but of course as I changed how I was asking Katai didn’t know what to do.
We did it a couple of times in both directions at the trot (still on the struggle bus with this one) and Katai was getting jazzed up but not tense!! She never once lost her mind and she remained very soft and pliable, she just didn’t quite understand and because we just let her not understand and figure it out there were absolutely no meltdowns. None.
We gave her a break and worked on me at the walk for a minute and then we went to canter. Jane wanted me to try a different exercise for this. The plan was to do a leg yield from the center line and as we hit the wall cue for a canter, do one 20 meter circle and then go down the long side with a transition to trot prior to the next short side. I have to admit that I cringed a bit. I had done the first part of this exercise with L and after the first time Katai figured out the plan and completely took over prior to the canter complete with lots of tension and pony tantrums (bucking spinning and refusing to go forward). Of course at that time we couldn’t really even leg yield but still, I had some legit concerns.
I went to do it the first time, took a breath, sat and cued for the canter and other than a little leap she didn’t do a thing wrong. I had asked that we start with her tough side so while it was a bit flaily (when your human actually sits on their inside seat bone and you have to carry them with your weaker inside leg it’s really tough to canter!) but it was there! We did the full exercise three times in that direction without a break and had absolutely no pony tantrums. Even better she never once anticipated! She literally stayed relaxed and on my aids the entire time and cantered when I cued and not before. She struggled a bit each time but we just let her figure it out.
Then without a break we switched to our easy side and it was like magic! All of a sudden her leg yield was brilliant, when I sat correctly she picked up the canter right away, and we had the most gorgeous, slow, three beat canter with some jump that we’ve ever had. We did the exercise three times that direction as well and still didn’t have any anticipation or pony tantrums and then called it a bit early.
Pony got LOTS of pets and verbal praise. Both Jane and I gushed over her in the ring and when I was grooming her and she even got a treat. Adult dressage ponies get cookies after particularly good rides after all
I've discovered/realized over the years that however amazing the intentions of my family are, they just don't like to get horse stuff for me (at least not any form of tack) and it's just better if I get that stuff for myself and let them get me things that they enjoy shopping for more.
With that being said, most years I get myself something for my birthday (December 11th) and something for Christmas, usually after Christmas with any money I got for Christmas.
This year though, thanks to aggressively paying off debt and putting some money in savings I've got a nice little chunk of money to spend so I'm having a great time shopping! There are so many options and since I don't have an limited budget I'm having fun picking out what I can put together that's fun and purely gifts for myself.
The Item(s) I'm Getting for Sure:
PS of Sweden Flying Change bridle -
I've been talking about this one for a long time and I finally get to purchase it!!
Broadband
Throat latch
Then, since I'm ordering the bridle and having it shipped I"m going to also get the throat latch so that I know I can show with it and of course I need a sparkly broadband. They're out of stock on the one I really want so I'm hoping it will be back in stock when it's time for me to get it.
My plan is to try to get it during their Black Friday sale so that maybe my money will go a little further!
The Tentative List:
Total Saddle Fit Girth:
I've already got a TSF girth but it's brown and it's always gapped at the front. Katai has never been girthy with it so I haven't worried much but now I'd like to fix that, plus to get a black girth that matches my saddle. Also, my current girth is a 24" because of how short the billets on my brown saddle were but my Prestige has normal dressage length billets so I want to get a shorter girth as well.
White Breeches:
I'm slowly putting together a show outfit. My goal is to do a rated show by the end of the year so I'm trying to pick up the things that I'll need as I go rather than waiting until I need it this summer. I'm planning to get a decent but not extremely expensive pair of white breeches I just have to figure out which ones!
Show Shirt:
I'd also like to get some sort of show shirt. The one in the picture is only $35 from Horze which is about what I'd like to spend on a show shirt at this point so I may just go with this one. I'm also going to pick up a couple more cheap ($10ish) polos from Old Navy for schooling shows but that's not what I'm getting myself for Christmas.
Other Stuff:
I'm also shopping for other non-horse stuff but most of that will probably end up on my christmas list for my family since they'll appreciate having some stuff to shop for.
